Gay Marriage

So, we deviate from our regular programming to briefly discuss some thoughts I've had. Specifically covering gay marriage. When Christians talk about why gay marriage is wrong, they usually quote the Bible, or mention that it's unnatural. Both are true, but if you're talking to someone who doesn't believe the Bible, well, that doesn't work. And if you say it's unnatural, so was interracial marriage, and we all know that was wrong.  In the end, a lot of the arguments I've seen have been very close minded arguments. It's wrong because it's wrong.... that doesn't help anyone, and just sounds intolerant. I believe it is wrong, but answers like that aren't helping anyone's point. Most likely, they're actually hindering. So, I've been thinking about this a lot, and this is the conclusion I've come to.
  If we want to talk about how marriage must be between a man and a woman, we have to clarify why it has to be between a man and a woman. What about marriage makes requires this distinction? This question in my mind extended to a new question. Why is it important that we get married? Most of us would say, you marry someone because you love them and want to spend the rest of your life with them. Well, that is exactly why homosexual people want to get married. They love their partner and want to spend the rest of their life with that person. So to say you're against their marriage when we're defining the purpose of marriage as a way to spend the rest of your life committed to the one you love, you are saying that you're against others' expression of love. That doesn't sound right. No Christian person would truly be against love, or showing that love towards another. Aren't we all striving for charity, which is the pure, nonjudgmental love of Christ?
   I maintain that same gender attraction is wrong, but this logic against it is also deeply flawed. So again, I return to my question, what is the purpose of marriage, and what about that makes it essential that it is between a man and a woman? This question took me a long time to find the answer to, but I think I finally have. Marriage is not about love. Yes, I said it... strange idea, considering the culture we are raised in which is so fixated on the idea of true love, everlasting love. No, the purpose of marriage is not love. The purpose of marriage is: CHILDREN.
   This is a hard pill to swallow. It was for me too. But that is why it is important to get married. In the words of Dallin H Oaks, (a man I respect deeply and an apostle of the LDS church), "[Marriage] has provided the cultural tie that seeks to connect the father to his children by binding him to the mother of his children." Marriage is for creating and raising children. The best environment to make them in involves a man and a woman. The best environment for raising them also requires a man and a woman, or a father and a mother.
    We are a rather self-centered culture. It is hard to imagine that the reason you get married is not for you, but for the next generation, the act of parenting. This is an act that I am coming more and more to know is a very self sacrificing act. But this is the true purpose of marriage. Love does and should have a place in marriage. But it is not the purpose, it is the reward. The greatest reward for raising children is having the love of your spouse. As you go through life together, raising children together, you encounter trials that can strengthen your love for each other. Your reward for weathering these trials is the opportunity to live with the person you love for eternity. So yes, we do get married because we love someone and want that opportunity, but the purpose for getting married is to raise children. Living with the love of your life is the reward that comes from getting married.
  If children is the purpose for getting married, and love is the reward, not the reason, then it is much easier to see why gay marriage is wrong. There is no way that two men, or two women can create a child. Yes, there is adoption, but that is the exception, they still cannot create a child. Gay marriage is wrong because it thwarts the entire purpose of marriage. It makes creating a family nearly impossible. They may be in love, but they cannot have a child, which is why marriage must remain between a man and a woman. This is why it is wrong, and this is why I am opposed to gay marriage.

On another note, if we accepted the idea that love is the reward of marriage, perhaps we would feel less entitled to love, and more willing to earn it, as rewards should be. Then when love waxes cold and we believe we must end the marriage with divorce, it is not our spouse's fault, but ours, for not working to earn the reward.

Also, you should know, I'm a big fan of love. I do believe it is important in a marriage. As a matter of fact, I am crazy in love with my husband and I married him because I was in love with him, and I plan to be in love with him for eternity.

If you want to read more about this, check out this talk:Dallin H Oaks "Protect the children" Or this article, by a child who was actually raised by lesbian women:http://catholicexchange.com/what-do-the-children-say/
 

Baby Shaming

I have been looking at a lot of dog shaming photos lately, I think they're pretty funny. After your dog does something bad, or has an odd habit, you take a photo of them next to a sign explaining what they did. Look for yourself here: www.dogshaming.com It makes me want to do some for Jace. Here are the photos I came up with.

BABY SHAMING!

Disclaimer: I do not plan on using this as a form of punishment for my child. I just thought it was funny and harmless since he will have no memory of this. He also had no idea what was going on in these pictures. This is most likely the only time I will do this.

Rollin' Rollin' Rollin'

Ok, three guesses, just from the title.... what do you think this post is on? :) Jace has figured out how to roll from his belly to his back. On Thursday, he rolled over for the first time. Since then, he has done it once a day. I'm so proud of my little roller.
He's also getting pretty close to rolling from back to front. Wednesday morning I was changing Jace's diaper and he spent the whole time trying to roll off of the changing table. He can get to his side ok, but it's the last bit he's still figuring out. When I hold his arm, he can roll all the way. He just needs something to brace against. No more stepping away from the changing table while he's on it! All too soon, we're gonna have a mobile baby! check out the video!

working on rolling back to belly...

Motherhood is....

Motherhood is having an enormous bladder so you can pee when it's convienent for the baby.
Motherhood is watching your child grow and cheering for each little accomplishment.
Motherhood is having a small stomach so you can eat when it's convienent.
Motherhood is smiling, even when you want to cry, because they just did something too cute for words.
Motherhood is being able to function on very little sleep.
Motherhood is looking into the eyes of someone who trusts you completely.
Motherhood is putting the baby down when you can't stand to hear him cry anymore.
Motherhood is picking him up again because you're the only one who can help him stop crying.
Motherhood is nursing with one hand and doing everything else with the other.
Motherhood is being the first one to find his ticklish spot.
Motherhood is changing diapers that make you want to gag.
Motherhood is playing with the happiest being in the world.
Motherhood is counting the hours till Daddy comes home.
Motherhood is being completely unconditionally loved and adored. (at least while they're babies)
Motherhood is catching yourself say the weirdest things you've ever heard.
Motherhood is singing during bathtime, bedtime, feeding time, and many times in between.
Motherhood is being the largest walking napkin in existance.
Motherhood is always being prepared for the worst, while many times enjoying the best.
Motherhood is knowing what the sound of each cry means.
Motherhood is the joy of making someone smile, every day.
Motherhood is saying things in a much higher and happier voice than the words merit.
Motherhood is being the cheif entertainer.
Motherhood is storing up stories to tell them at the most embarassing moment... or at least when they'll be old enough to remember it.
Motherhood is cheering over poop, burps and a flurry of excitement over spitups.
Motherhood is watching the clock, so you know exactly what they're crying about... sometimes.
Motherhood is watching your body change so that you can have children.
Motherhood is frustrating and joyful.
Motherhood is exciting and dull.
Motherhood is love.


Admittedly, this list is only for the first three months, and only from my experience as a mother, not as a father (some things relate to both).

Strange encounters of the baby kind

Jace is pretty funny.... We have caught him mimicking us a few times already. I sometimes growl at him, mimicking the way he opens his mouth all the time, and he will mimic my  mouth movements and occasionally make a growling sounds. The other day, I had the hiccups after lunch. They were really loud, so of course Jace could hear them as I was walking around the house. He started making hiccuping sounds, loud gasps, even though he didn't have the hiccups. It was pretty funny!
   Last night, I did something I KNEW I shouldn't have. Every time you talk to a parent, they talk about that one time where either they or their spouse got spit up on their face, or better, in their mouth because they were holding the baby above their head. I have heard these stories SO many times lately, I am convinced that parents should have learned by now that you just don't hold your baby above your head. Of course, lately, I've begun holding Jace above my head. He likes it, it makes him smile and I'm sure he'll start giggling over it too.... Well, last night I got my spit up story. Jace is a big time drooler. One of his new nicknames is the drool monster. Every time I hold him over my head, he will have a drool droplet hanging out of his mouth. If I act fast enough, I can wipe it off or put him down before it lands on me. Last night, I didn't.... I saw the drool coming for me, one long string headed straight for my face and I moved him out of the way just as it hit my face. I had a drool mustache extending from one ear to the other; MMMmmmMM! And no, of course I haven't learned my lesson.

He even obliged us with a drool photo for the family photo shoot!

   Jace has also begun giggling. It's hard to tell when he'll giggle, or what triggers it so that we can get him to giggle. I tried tickling him this morning and he started crying really hard.... Oops!   But there is one thing that we can pretty consistantly count on getting a giggle for. He laughs every time I take his clothes off in the morning. I have no idea why this is hilarious, especially since I stop whatever I'm doing in excitement about his giggling and then he stops giggling but it's super cute! Apparently nakedness is hilarious.
  It's gotten cold here lately, so I've had to start bundling him up. This is a little sooner than I expected, so he hasn't quite grown into his winter suit yet. It's really cute to see him in this oversize suit, and watch the confusion on his face when he can't properly suck on his fists...

New Developments!

I think one of the best things about having a baby is watching how quickly they learn and grow. It's so exciting to see each development come. Yesterday, he discovered my keys. The jingling noise they made was fascinating, and he couldn't take his eyes off of them. (By which I discovered he can now track things in a circle.) So I got out the baby toys. He likes the rattles, he enjoys watching them as they make noise. His bouncer has a bar over it that toys hang off of, and when we put this on now, he stares at the yellow elephant rattle. He loves it!
He's also discovered his fists. He stares at his fingers and fists. Kinda funny, because it makes him go cross-eyed.

Jace is the biggest drooler I've ever seen. Supposedly he's not supposed to start that for another month, but he drools so much, sometimes I call him the rabid baby...

Rabid baby is not impressed

We've also heard his first laugh! It was so cute and exciting to hear. It's so fun to see his joy because it's so pure, his whole body wriggles with joy when he grins at us. I love to see it!

See the blurriness in his hands? He is wriggling with excitement

Who knew you had to brush a baby's hair? I brush his hair to clean the scalp, but he got his first rat's nest today! I think I'm gonna have to cut it off, because I can't brush it out and I don't want to pull his hair...

A couple of things I've learned from Jace:
1 a meal is not fully enjoyed unless it's all over your face when you're done.
2 Some things are  best enjoyed through your mouth. (he's still figuring out which ones)
3 It doesn't do good to sit in one spot for too long...

The sideways plugger-sucker

Jace has been making so many developments lately! Topping the list of accomplishments are his new sleeping abilities. He can now fall asleep on his own at night when we put  him in the crib. He's done it for 5 days in a row now. He sleeps for one six hour stretch at night followed by at least another two hours. He is falling into a napping routine where we take a nap every morning around 10:30, then again around 1:30, then another one in the late afternoon. Such an improvement! He is so much happier now, especially first thing in the morning, he is all smiles.
 







Which brings us to another accomplishment of his-SMILING! He is so cute and he is just full of them for mommy and daddy in the morning. Sometimes he gets distracted from eating because he's trying to smile while sucking... doesn't work so well!

He's also getting pretty good at soothing himself with sucking. He can find his fist and suck on it when he wants it, which is really cute. He sucks on his thumb sometimes too. He's also better at keeping the plugger in his mouth on his own, except he always sucks on it sideways!

One of his latest favorite hobbies is sticking out his tongue. It's hardly ever in his mouth anymore! Between smiling and sticking out his tongue, his mouth is hardly ever closed... but the cooing sounds he makes are so cute! It's less cooing and more like he's talking! I have heard him say the words hi, yeah and daddy... but he's so young, we can't count it as talking yet.

 He's pretty good at standing too...with a little help!